Transitions, Ink

Monday, October 29, 2007

Early On-Set February Blahs

There are those days when it feels like bedtime and it's only 7 p.m. And there are those weeks that feel like Friday when it's only Monday. But I'm having an outrageously exaggerated version of that phenomenon. I've got the February Blahs and winter hasn't even begun. It's not even (all that) cold. There aren't even enough leaves on the ground yet to start raking (we like to do it all at once). Not only that, we're still on daylight savings time.

Maybe I'm ready for spring already because I'm anticipating all that awaits me this winter and that is a recipe for overwhelm if there ever was one. Or maybe this is how bears feel just before they go into hibernation: if I just take a week and stuff myself with food, then tuck myself in all warm and snug and go to sleep, when I wake up the icicles will be melting from the eavestroughs and spring will be on its way.

But if I did that I wouldn't be able to get any knitting in. Or snowboarding. Or yoga. Or watch my hockey team. Or see my writerly soulmates at the January residency...

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Submission Three: Done

Another MFA submission off the desk. Many of my co-MFA-ers appear to be hitting walls right along with me at the moment. I've come to the conclusion that it is both an upside and a downside of low-residency programs that you can continue with your regular life/career as you do them.

The upside is the obvious one: no need to drop a thriving career, relocate to another city, or anything like that. Life, as you knew it, does not need to end...or at least not quite.

This leads to the downside. Most of us already had full lives and, as a result, the low-residency MFA just takes the regular life and ADDS full-time graduate student responsibilities to it. They estimate that to get the most out of the program you need to put in about 25 hours a week. YOU try finding 25 hours in a week. It's not easy. But the thing is, even when it's not 25 hours, I do manage to find time in a week to write.

This leads to another upside. Life in a low-residency program is probably a lot like the writing life actually is for many writers. From what I can see, most writers have other commitments as well: teaching, speaking, day-jobs not directly connected to their work, partners and children...If you're going to write, you need to carve time out of an ordinary day in which to honor that need (it is, after all, a need. I can't see anyone sticking with it if it's anything less!).

This leads to another downside. Burn out. If the low-residency MFA is a sign of things to come, and if the level of burn out I am now experiencing after the third submission of the third semester is going to be a fact of life, I'm not sure I can make it. I came very close this month to hitting the "what's the point of it all?" wall.

I want to end on an upside. Support. Since most of the other students are in the same situation, the support in a low residency MFA is incredible. I've heard that MFA programs can be competitive and unsupportive. I haven't experienced anything but encouragement and support from the circle of writers I've met through this program. They're fantastic. And for the final upside, if we didn't have all that time in between the times we get to see one another, the residencies wouldn't be quite so magical. In a full time residential program, it would be impossible to sustain the magic of the residencies.

Upsides: 4
Downsides: 2